I created this “booklet” several years ago….At that time, I had a pattern of trying to fix things for people and tended to end up listening to many more complaints and negativity than was healthy for either other people or myself. At some point, I finally realized I wasn’t helping others or myself by this strategy…and realized it was time to change….and hence, this booklet.
I was talking with someone the other day who is in this situation of listening to an overwhelming number of complaints from someone else. I’m posting this booklet in case the ideas in the booklet might be helpful to anyone else.
And so…for those of us who might be on the receiving end of “too many complaints”….perhaps to realize that listening to negativity doesn’t benefit anyone and to start learning to put firm limits on what we listen to.
Added note: a possible way to use this booklet might be to print it out and show it to the person who is presenting problems…mentioning that someone with an online blog had created and posted it…not specific to anyone, just for general use. It also might be used as a “conversation starter”, to bring up the subject in a more “neutral” fashion.
Ha ha! Excellent, I’m definitely going to incorporate this in my responses to the ‘moaners’ in future. I used to get right in there, trying to ‘fix’ my loved ones problems but last year it reached critical mass and I, too, said ‘no more, I’m done!’ Even as I was facing enormous challenges of my own, the complainants didn’t seem to take on board that I was batting the responsibility for their messy lives back to them. So I had to spell it out to each of them, one by one ~ with love but firmly. And guess what? They pulled their own socks up and got on with it!! You are so right ~ listening to too much negativity doesn’t benefit any of us. Thank you for spelling it out so clearly! 🙂
Hi wightrabbit…. I’m surprised you found this post! There is so much within this blog that lots of the “pages” and “booklets” don’t get “found.”
Oh, I know so well that dynamic you’re talking about: “Been there, done that”…that’s for sure. What a relief to shut the door of that “stand.” It took me a LONG time to get there, and I really got worn down before I got there… but eventually, I learned…and sounds like you did too! Isn’t that amazing that “they” pulled themselves together and got on with it?