An expansion on some of the ideas in the 1/16/2014 post: “No matter what….”
Many of us have probably had times when we’ve felt a bit “invisible” or “not seen”…or not as supported or appreciated as we might wish to be… perhaps within relationships, maybe simply walking down the street, sometimes when in groups of people…
These pages are a “walk through” of a progressin of ideas…. working from realizing how a sense of “not seen-ness” might feel within “oneself”… “I” ….eventually realizing that “every being on earth matters, myself included”
Extending out to having increasing empathy and support for others in our lives… people who might be feeling that way right now…“You matter, no matter what….”
And then expanding our thoughts further outward to a “society” level…. realizing and living with the awareness and understanding that “every single being on earth matters, every single one of us included…”
An explanation: During most of December and the beginning of January, I stayed home on my own, all day, almost every day… almost like a retreat…reading wisdom teachings, reflecting, sitting, pondering… a meaningful time, but almost no contact during each day with other people. (that was the “Bear Meditation” Winter Solstice “go quiet, go deep” time )
The 3 people that I care most deeply about and who I mainly connect with, were very busy with their own activities and lives, so had very little time or energy for contact with, interest in or interactions with me.
( I’m fortunate to usually enjoy lots of loving interaction, attention and caring from those 3 people, so was rather taken aback to not have that…but I learned lots from that strong and unpleasant sense of “lacking.”)
(by the way, I could have called other people or gone out and gotten together with others, but chose to stay home )
After awhile, I started to react….in my mind….
“Where is everybody?” “Doesn’t anybody care?” “Why isn’t anybody talking to me?” “Where did everyone go?” “Won’t anyone listen?” “Am I invisible?” “Where is everyone?”
After tumbling for a number of days with those reactions….big tumbles… I eventually started to realize…
Wait a minute…
“every being on earth matters, simply by being here… myself included.”
I started to realize that how much others pay attention, listen, respond, interact with me etc is not in my control, and not a reflection of my basic “worth” or “value” as a “being” on this earth…that…
“no matter what, each and every being on earth matters, myself included.”
And hence the evolving of these pages below…
( I create these pages to help myself to develop greater and deeper understanding and clarity. I make the pages, print them out, tape them up in places where I’ll see them and then reflect on them over the following days and weeks….)…
The pages are an evolution of thinking and reflecting, over a period of several weeks…sharing here, in case others might have similar “challenges” or find some value in the evolving ideas… in case others might relate and develop their own understandings….
I do feel that every other being on earth matters…
so to learn to extend that kindness and awareness to…
Have you ever felt “ignored, ” “un-noticed” or unappreciated?
(which might happen when alone or even in a small or big group of people)
And, perhaps, started to feel that you “didn’t matter” ???
Here’s what I’ve been figuring out about that…
Tying in closely with these ideas about wishing others were paying more attention to us or that we would be “seen,” I recently read helpful ideas in a wonderful book by RamDass, Polishing the Mirror, How to Live From Your Spiritual Heart.
In the book, RamDass writes about the importance of recognizing and respecting that each and everyone of us has our own karmic journey…that we each have our own lessons to learn and for us to learn to have enough love and respect for others to NOT interfere with the activities and choices in their journeys…
So here are some ideas I’ve been thinking about…
Sometimes, our journeys do connect….
But, sometimes each of our own “journeys” simply don’t connect…
at the time we might prefer,
in the quantity or quality we might prefer,
in the way we might prefer,
in the manner in which we might prefer…
To start to realize and respect that I have my own journey,
as others also have their own journeys…
to offer respect, acceptance and support…to each other’s journeys
Expanding that awareness out to thinking about….
and other people who might be dealing with similar concerns
being part of nurturing, supportive, caring and loving relationships
is so important and precious in all of our lives…
feeling connected is a precious and vital part of life….
but for me to keep in mind, that at times, those qualities might not be as readily available from or expressed by others…and that “everyone matters,” whether those are forthcoming or not…
Each and every one of us “matters” simply by being here on this earth…
….simply by being here….
Expanding out to ideas about valuing people
in terms of various common “social” considerations…
qualities that tend to be valued in many areas…especially Western cultures.
Seeing the deep value and worth of each being,
having absolutely nothing to do with these superficial criteria,
criteria that we might mis-use when looking at perceived “value” of ourselves or others,
criteria that separate people into groups of “us” and “them”
better than, more important than, more desirable than…
extraordinarily unfortunate separations,
and simply not true
Below are some other potentially mis-used criteria or values…
Having some these may make life easier, more enjoyable or interesting…
but they have nothing to do with the “deeper value” of each being on earth,
those separating criteria do not have deeper or lasting value
(I’ve had, or still have, many or most of these, and… they may feel good…often enjoyable….and certainly make life “easier,” at times. But in the larger scheme…in my experience, they don’t “really” matter…they don’t lead to any deeper, kinder, more loving, more meaningful or lasting happiness.. they do nothing to contribute to greater happiness among our greater family of all beings on earth)
tying some of the ideas together,
my own perspective…
Every single being on earth matters, no matter what…
this is as far as I’ve gotten with these ideas…
which is way farther along than several weeks ago,
a work in progress
Any thoughts or ideas from others who might read this?